Good Quotes, Bad Quotes, Some as big as your head...

Hmmm.... and you really did that?

Here are some quotes, clever-witted and horrific!:

"The death of one is a tragedy; the death of thousands is a statistic."

"It is not those who vote that count, but those who count the votes."

Both attributed to Iosef Stalin

I've got about 20 top quotes printed onto sheets of A4 and stuck round my walls, but I also have a George Bush quotes poster . I'll mix up a couple and maybe add more later

and anyone remember this bloke?

I think that'll do for now...

Mr Scrub

More from Mohammed Saeed al Sahaf:

"The midget Bush and that Rumsfield deserve only to be beaten with shoes by freedom loving people everywhere."

and from Douglas Adams:

"I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by."

"In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move."

and yes Dearmer that actually happened!

And Mr S i also have that poster.

Another one from the great Einstien:

legendary

I also have a Bush quotes poster:

"There's no question that the moment I got elected the storm clouds on the horizon were getting nearly directly overhead"

Chuckle chuckle

titter titter *titters*

MS

ye gods that guy has sed some bard things.

too many for this meagre (but oh so shiny) forum.

This seems the appropriate moment to offer up this item which you may have seen before. It is a poem assembled by a Washington Post reporter, comprised entirely of the Sayings of Mr. Bush. Snopes.com checked it out, and, in fact, they do mostly seem to be direct quotes...

MAKE THE PIE HIGHER
by George W. Bush

I think we all agree, the past is over.
This is still a dangerous world.
It's a world of madmen and uncertainty
and potential mental losses.

Rarely is the question asked
Is our children learning?
Will the highways of the Internet become more few?
How many hands have I shaked?

They misunderestimate me.
I am a pitbull on the pantleg of opportunity.
I know that the human being and the fish can coexist.
Families is where our nation finds hope, where our wings take dream.

Put food on your family!
Knock down the tollbooth!
Vulcanize society!
Make the pie higher! Make the pie higher!

YES!!! Too long since i read that

You've made me very happy, magrat

we-el seen as our good american friends are extracting the micheal from our beloved bush i guess its ok

Back on slightly serious note:

but you knew I couldn't keep it serious all the way through:

(thanks for clearing that one up...). But obviously that was exactly how he wanted to be perceived, because

MS

here's a few to mull over....

"The world is more like it is now then it ever has before."
- Dwight Eisenhower

"Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas."
- Former Australian cabinet minister Keppel Enderbery

"He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning regardless of what time it is."
- Lou Duva, veteran boxing trainer, on the Spartan training regime of heavyweight Andrew Golota.

and one i have just found:

"If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again."
- Terry Venables

Here is some more funny quotes ..

"Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air for even longer."
- David Acfield

i wonder y ...

and finaly a quote said by George W. Bush ..

"It is white."
- George W. Bush, when asked what the White house was like by a student in East London

"Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society." --Mark Twain

"Wise men talk because they have something to say. Fools talk because they have to say something."
-- Plato

Both so very very true

Just a few religously orientated quotes ... Don't flame me.

Don't let your worries get the best of you; remember Moses started out as a basket case.

People are funny, they want the front of the bus, middle of the road, and the back of the church.

I don't know why some people change churches? What difference does it make which one you stay home from?

WP

*flames him*

"English? why do i need to know that? im never going to go to england!"
- Homer Simpson
(just some random person who no-one has heard of)

The knack of flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

--Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy

Its very hard to do

Just one more on GWB:

from the liner notes to Dr John's album Right Place, Right Time, Live @ Tipitina's - Mardi Gras '89; referring to how GWB handled the Katrina crisis

Just to show that GWB doesn't have the monpopoly on letting us laugh at american presidents:

Oddly enough, there was a president not too long ago with an actual sense of humor. Too bad his policies didn't keep pace with his humor, but every once in a while he told a good joke, which made us forget the pain for a moment.

"The goal of my administration is that by 1992, every American should be able to program his VCR." George H. W. Bush

He was famous lacking in the area of "the vision thing," another of his most quotable quotes.

...but made for a superb Sisters of Mercy single!
Off to wind up CD player....

I have a nice little image which is full of cool quotes (hope it works)

(will load a random quote each time )

the Moses joke reminds me the following (less known) quote , by Golda Meir (former israli PM, and quite a witty person) -

“Let me tell you something that we Israelis have against Moses. He took us 40 years through the desert in order to bring us to the one spot in the Middle East that has no oil!”

and IMHO her all time best -
"Don't be so humble, you're not that great.”

I reject your reality and substitute my own-Adam Savage (from Mythbusters)

That one was rather spoiled for me by their putting it in the episode leader. Heard it a few score* times too often.

Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe. (Albert Einstein.)

*Discovery channel still repeats all the series often.

I agree too many reruns

All that glitters is not gold

ok, one from thud itself which cracks me up everytime....

pg42(hb)

on sir reynold stitched wa of talking:
"it was not so much speach as modulated yawning"(TP)

"Nobby was having a problem. 'here, sarge, what's he going on about?' he wispered. 'it sounds like he's yawning all the time. whats a galler rear?'
"a gallery nobby. thats very high class talking that is'(colon)

LOL

Where i work we used to have this thing from Johnny Dnagerously 9the 1984 film) where anytime some one did something we didn't like we would put it in the "once quote"

The original quote was by Danny Vermin: "You shouldn't grab me Johnny, My mother grabbed me once.....ONCE!"

He also does other "once" quotes.

Any way i would often reply to peoples questions and stuff with a once quote.

e.g "Hey, did you have a nice weekend?" reply "You shouldn't ask me that, my mother asked me that once...ONCE!"

It was funnier if you were there.

honest!

never violate a woman,nor harm a child.do not lie,cheat or steal.these things are for lesser men.protect the weak against the evil strong.do not allow thoughts of gain to lead you into the pursuits of evil.

Druss the legend

'How do you get a lawn like this? You mows it and you rolls it for five hundred years and then a bunch of bastards walks across it.'

The University gardener
from Sourcery
page 14

One for fun and one to ponder.

First they laugh at you
Then they ignore you
then they fight you
then you win
-Ghandi.

"'Interactive?' said Vimes. 'What do you mean?'
'Hwell, people can ... look at the pictures as much as they hwant' said Sir Reynold. He sounded a little annoyed. People shouldn't ask that kind of question.
'And the pictures do what exactly?'
'Er ... hang there, commander,' said Sir Reynold. 'Of course.'
'So what you mean is, people can come and look at the pictures, and the pictures, for their part, are loked at.'
'Rather like that, yes.' Said the currator. He thought for a moment, aware that this probably wasn't sufficient, and added, 'But dynamicaleah'"
Thud! pg 270 -doubleday hradback edition.

Almost forgot

Rehab is for quitters

I say no to drugs but they just don't listen

A DAY WITHOUT LAUGHTER IS A DAY WASTED! -Charlie Chapline

"My friends tell me to stop smoking and do excercise but I tell them what do you get out of excercise that you can't get out from cigarettes? It makes your face red, it makes you out of breath and it makes you feel tired. Then they say "but it can kill you" I just say smoking is an extreme sport!"

life is like a box of chocolates,you never know what you're gonna get

to carry over from OOK's quote
"...Your life however is like a box of ACTIVE GRENADES!"
Stewie Griffin

Also food eaten while walking containes no callories and a chocolate you didn't want to eat doean't count.

i'm not even gonna begin fighting you on quotes,you know too many

This is soooo typical once again evolved man must teach the lesser species...the trick is to watch TV...and lots of it

SHOW ME THE MONEY!!!

jerry maguire

We have asked you two to stop interfering with other topics with your mindless bickering.

NOW STOP OR GO AWAY!

"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the former."

very true, but calm down old bean! we dont want any broken people

i will gladly stop,you are right and i apologise.

Thank you.

“Man is a rational animal who always loses his temper when he is called upon to act in accordance with the dictates of reason."

Oscar Wilde

I also appologise, It was my fault, I should have known better

This one's from Rage Agaisnt the Machine's "Mic Check"
I thought it was an appropriate thought in this day and age:

"With this mic device
I spit nonfiction
Who got tha power
This be my question
Tha mass of tha few in this torn nation?
Tha priest tha book or tha congregation?
Tha politricks who rob and hold down your zone?
Or those who give tha thieves tha key to their homes?
Tha pig who's free to murder one Shucklak
Or survivors who make a move and murder one back?"

Thank you, as well, then.

"If this works, it's because dwindera gave me painstaking intructions ('place
fingers on keyboard...KEYBOARD...it's that oblong thing...) and here I am,
maybe."

from Pterry's first post on a.f.p

Freedom is not worth having if it does not include the freedom to make mistakes.

Gandhi

“we are on an irreversible course of freedom and justice, but things could change”-GWB

“I am a donut”-John F Kennedy (once translated to English)

“we all have a one in one chance of dieing”-unknown

Genuine question asked by a tourist* at the information centre in Stratford-upon-Avon:

"The map is great, but can you tell us the quickest route to Shakespeare's manger?"

Mr Scrub

*Yes, I'm afraid it was an American...